December 16, 2010
The title is pretty self explanatory.
It’s not that I don’t like to pray. I’m just not very good at it.
I’ve never gotten into the habit of praying regularly. I get bogged down under the pressure to say what I want in some beautiful way. My mind wanders horribly. I don’t fall asleep but I do end up making checklists of things I need to get done when I’m done praying. I try to recite to Lord’s Prayer when I’m desperate, but I know this gorgeous song-version of it, so then I just end up singing. I sometimes feel like I’m a crazy person. (I’m very sorry if you are really good at praying and this offends you. I genuinely want to be better at it). In most circumstances, talking to someone no one else can see isn’t regarded highly in today’s society. I then get distracted trying to remind myself that I’m not crazy–you see the trouble?
I want to be good at praying.
I want to be a selfless pray-er. I don’t want to come at God like He’s a magic genie sent to fulfill my wishes, but I usually don’t know what else to say.
Sometimes, though, there are amazing passages in the Bible that say all I’ve ever wanted to say. David’s prayer/Psalm of forgiveness is one great example. Here’s another.
First, I’d like to establish for you the relationship God and Moses had.
“The Lord would speak to Moses face-to-face, as a man speaks with his friend.”--Exodus 33:11
I long for that.
It is from this place that Moses is able to pray this prayer.
“If You are pleased with me, teach me Your ways so I may know you and continue to find favor with You.”–Exodus 33:13
It is a prayer I borrow when I don’t know what else to say. This is all I want: to know God and truly find favor in His eyes.
Here’s another great thing: “The Lord replied, ‘My presence will go with you and I will give you all the rest.’”–Exodus 33:14
The Lord replied and made a promise to provide. I hang onto that.